WHY SHOULD I FORGIVE?

Our hurts come in many shapes and sizes. And hurts require forgiveness. The range of your pain could be anything from simple frustration over your sister borrowing your clothes to sheer rage over the bad memories of your Dad kicking the crap out of you. The situations causing the pain are limitless. You may have faced a boyfriend dumping you, harsh words from a co-worker, lies from a friend, unfair treatment from a spouse, a parent constantly belittling you, a recent date rape, divorce papers being filed or battles over your step-children. The list goes on...

But remember, life is relationships. Living with people will usually bring some pain. Living without people will always bring pain. It is far better to learn how to resolve the hurts with people than to avoid any hurts without people.

Forgiveness is as important to healthy relationships as water is to our bodies. You can die of bitterness as easily as from thirst. Everybody has to learn how to forgive at some point in life to survive.

But when someone really hurts you, I mean causes a crater of pain in your heart, do they need to be forgiven?

Simply put – yes. In over 3 decades of helping people with people problems the place of forgiveness is critical in making life work. So here are a few reasons why you need to learn to forgive...frankly, the sooner the better for you.

YOUR OWN PEACE OF MIND. You will live with far less anxiety when you decide to forgive. Brooding over your hurt only keeps it alive longer and sadly not unlike a cancer, it grows both larger and deeper sending out many tentacles. By laying down the hurt you choose to forgive- releasing the offense. In forgiving, you let go of your need for justice and getting the wrong righted. Yet, it begins to calm the waters inside...the churning pain within stops.

BITTERNESS DESTROYS YOU. Letting your heart stay focused on the hurt of the past keeps you there. To hold on to the resentment doesn’t punish the other person; it devastates you. It’s like drinking poison and somehow thinking the other person will die. Active hostility and private animosity both do the same thing. They not only rob you of freedom but affect all other relationships as well. Don’t go there.

BREAKS THE CHAINS. When you forgive, you do so not because they deserve it, knowing they could never earn it, and not waiting until they ask for it. You forgive to free yourself from the daily shackles of targeted bitter memories. That’s how you loose those chains that keep dragging you along. Forgiveness takes you out of a helpless, vulnerable spot.

YOUR LIFE IS NOT ON HOLD. If you wait until they decide to ask for forgiveness or take responsibility for the pain they caused, your health fully depends on them. If they don’t come to apologize, then you are on hold. You are stuck because they aren’t budging. Do you want to wait until they are ready to move on? This leaves you at the mercy of their response. Take charge of your life and step out of the prison of bitterness.

GOD ASKS US TO FORGIVE. Forgiveness was God’s idea in the first place. He needs to forgive us repeatedly and does it so well. He is the God of second chances. He calls us to this higher way. He wrote the manual on how humankind works best and He knows that bitterness only corrodes your soul. Granted you may need to ask God to help you; most of us do. But when you do choose to forgive, you honor God and that in itself brings a sense of satisfaction knowing that you are doing what is right.

When you have been wronged, the choice to harbor your hurt won’t lead to a healthier you. Think about it...you have all these great reasons to begin to move on. I challenge you to get started on your freedom now.

Stay tuned for HOW TO FORGIVE.

Be sure to pass this on to someone who needs this and come back for more life tips.